A Delightful Alternative to the Traditional Red Poinsetta!

Instead, try a red gun, just like this wonderfully festive Ruger .22 from Tactical Solutions in Boise, ID.

A lovely anodized firearm makes a thought-provoking alternative centerpiece to any holiday table. Imagine this Pac-Lite surrounded by red and green Christmas tree ornaments, topped by a sprinkling of artificial snow and a few .22 cartridges with their tips dipped in brightly colored paint. And what other centerpiece is capable of match accuracy at 25 yards? Should the holiday turkey rise from its stuffing to make a final last stand, a Pac-Lite centerpiece could prove the difference between leftover turkey sandwiches and a trip to the hospital after a bad pecking!

If you have a large home and correspondingly large tree, consider using a brightly colored firearm in place of that ratty stuffed angel you've been duct-taping to the treetop for heaven knows how long. That way, the crowning ornament could do double duty if your Christmas Iron Chef party featured a Secret Ingrediant that was still alive and kicking, like, say, a marmot! When was the last time you attended any Christmas party that included catching, cleaning and cooking a marmot as part of the festivities??? You won't find that in any of Martha Stewart's lousy books!

Or you can...wait wait...I think I need more painkillers...and to lay down a while longer...