...last night of an undetected and undetectable heart problem...I can't write this now...oh God, we miss her!
The House Dog’s Grave
by Robinson Jeffers
(Haig, an English bulldog)
I’ve changed my ways a little; I cannot now
Run with you in the evenings along the shore,
Except in a kind of dream; and you, if you dream a moment,
You see me there.
So leave awhile the paw-marks on the front door
Where I used to scratch to go out or in,
And you’d soon open; leave on the kitchen floor
The marks of my drinking-pan.
I cannot lie by your fire as I used to do
On the warm stone,
Nor at the foot of your bed; no, all the nights through
I lie alone.
But your kind thought has laid me less than six feet
Outside your window where firelight so often plays,
And where you sit to read - and I fear often grieving for me -
Every night your lamplight lies on my place.
You, man and woman, live so long, it is hard
To think of you ever dying.
A little dog would get tired, living so long.
I hope that when you are lying
Under the ground like me your lives will appear
As good and joyful as mine.
No, dears, that’s too much hope: you are not so well cared for
As I have been.
And never have known the passionate undivided
Fidelities that I knew.
Your minds are perhaps too active, too many-sided….
But to me you were true.
You were never masters, but friends. I was your friend.
I loved you well, and was loved. Deep love endures
To the end and far past the end. If this is my end,
Deepest condolences. Very sorry for the tough few months you have had. Very hard, as anyone knows who has been lucky enough to have been blessed by that kind of companionship.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry to hear this, Micheal… you, and Brigid from Home on the Range, lost her Lab Barkley…We Grieve with Thee….
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for your loss. Nothing I can write will help, but at times like this, I remember something my mom told me when we lost our dog when I was young. She said how lucky our dog was to always have food, water, warmth, shelter, protection and love throughout her all too short life. Her life was never in danger due to predators or harsh weather. No matter how much we give our dogs, they always seem to give us more back in return.
ReplyDeleteMichael,
ReplyDeleteI am truly sorry for your loss.
My wife and I lost Layla in January.She dug her way under our fence about 14 years ago.
http://i918.photobucket.com/albums/ad29/mikedowden/IMG_2167_zps786e889e.jpg
Alf and her are missed.
Mike
My heart goes out to you and your Sweetie.
ReplyDeleteVery sorry to hear that MB.
ReplyDeleteTom Bogan
Laconia NH
Very sad news, loosing a pet is such a blow but he will be waiting for you on the other side. Deepest condolences
ReplyDeleteGerard
Rocky Hill, CT
My condolences to you and your sweetie. As others have mentioned, it's been a rough time recently for pet owners. Dr. Jerry Pournelle of Byte fame also lost his beloved Malamute recently.
ReplyDeleteMy heart goes out to you two, and prayers for peace. After listening to three years worth of podcasts, I feel like I knew Alf. A wonderful companion. Damn, it's dusty in here.
ReplyDeleteMichael, we're so sorry for your loss. As the owners of a beagle, we can only guess at your sorrow. They are such affectionate dogs and they bond so deeply with their human packs. Take care.
ReplyDeleteYou have my condolences. A while back we lost our two dogs over the course of a couple of years. They truly are family members.
ReplyDeleteDeepest condolences, nothing hurts as bad as the loss of a true, pure friend.
ReplyDeleteFirst, Pokke-San and now Alf the Wonder Beagle. I know the loss of one was hard but the two of them must be damn near unbearable.
ReplyDeleteI will keep you and your Sweetie in my prayers.
So sorry for your lose, Mr. Bane. You'll be in our prayers.
ReplyDeleteCondolences
ReplyDeleteMy sympathies on the loss of Alf. We lost our 17 year old black lab in January.
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts and prayers are with you and your Sweetie tonight.
ReplyDeleteSorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteSo, so very sorry to hear this sad news.
ReplyDeleteThank you for letting me know early today. You all have been in my thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDeleteTwo weeks and I still miss Barkley as much as that first night looking at an empty dog bed.
To Alf and Barkley - a toast tonight, and a remembrance.
Michael,
ReplyDeleteThis has to be almost cruel to you. I pray for you and your partner as you go through this loss - again.
I know you gave her a great life and I know she will be waiting for you on the other side. Waiting for you to take her down that next trail together.
You will see her again and she will be waiting for you. She will be waiting for you because she loves you as you are.
Godspeed...
George
Sorry for the loss.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry, Michael. If this is any comfort, there are theologically sound reasons to believe you will see Alf again. A friend-of-a-friend who flatlined during an operation has experienced this.
ReplyDeleteAlf is not done with you just yet. He has one more important task to perform.
ReplyDeletehttp://youtu.be/5L1BSnxH4b4
And the deepest condolences from the missus and myself.
I'm so sorry, M. Bane. Truly heartbreaking.
ReplyDeleteMichael, words cannot express how sorry I am for you and your sweetie. I absolutely know how hard it is. That is exactly how my basset passed this past June. I still weep for him often. Best wishes for y'all.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry to hear of the loss of both of your companions.
ReplyDeleteIt's tough ...
Best wishes.
Guy
Michael, our grief is in equal proportion as our love and though the loss and empty-pain is great, we that are loved by our dogs would not have it any other way. Through your conversations via this blog and your podcasts, I felt a kinship with Alf. I have been owned by several great dogs over my life including one that is still with me in the flesh. Each one has taught me a lot about life, and death. The spirit of Alf is very alive. I believe you will be reunited. Peace be with you.
ReplyDeleteThere is no loss quite like the loss of a dog. My deepest condolences.
ReplyDeleteVery sorry to hear this. It's the price we humans pay for all the good years together.
ReplyDeleteVery sorry to hear of your loss. You are one of us - a gun person and an animal person. We share your pain.
ReplyDeleteSaying goodbye to faithful four-legged friends, friends that have have added immeasurable value to one's life, is hard; real hard. Unfortunately, I've had the sad experience in my lifetime way too many times.
ReplyDeleteLike I posted about Barkley's passing on Brigid's website:
The greatest curse on a man is that he doesn't get to grow old with his dog.
- Sir Winston Churchill
I'll add another one for you and yours, Michael:
It takes a lot to laugh; it takes a train to cry.
- Robert Zimmerman
I am so sorry Michael for your loss.
ReplyDeleteTerrible news, Michael...so very sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteHeartfelt condolences to you and your sweetie. our grief at their passing is the price we pay for the joy and love they bring into our lives.
ReplyDeleteFrom your podcasts it is obvious how close you were. I grieve for the sudden loss of such a good friend.
ReplyDelete“It came to me that every time I lose a dog they take a piece of my heart with them.
And every new dog who comes into my life gifts me with a piece of their heart.
If I live long enough, all the components of my heart will be dog,
and I will become as generous and loving as they are.”
- Anonymous
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteMichael,
ReplyDeleteI am heartbroken at your loss, so sorry brother.
Dwaine
I hope the smiles of the memories push the tears of the loss out of reach very, very soon.
ReplyDeleteLet me add my voice to the many that have expressed sorrow, pain, and disbelief at the loss of Alf. Know that the two of you are in our thoughts and prayers. I hope the pain leaves soon and the fond memories return sooner than latter
ReplyDeleteI am so very sorry to hear of your loss. Condolences from my family to yours.
ReplyDeleteI'm very sorry for your loss mr. Bane
ReplyDeleteI join you to celebrate Alf's life. From reading about Alf you gave your friend a good life and he paid you back the way dogs do. Sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteVery sorry, Micheal. All of us knew how much you loved her. Thoughts and prayers for you and your sweetie.
ReplyDeleteVery sorry for your loss. Pets ARE family, and should live as long as us but alas.
ReplyDeleteI am so sadden to hear of your loss. I have almost come to consider Alf as one of my own through your podcasts and blog. Alf will be missed.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry, Michael
ReplyDeleteMarch 3, 2013, we lost Chance to a spleen tumor. Still hurts. Alf is in great company up there.
ReplyDelete“If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.”
― Will Rogers
I am so sorry to hear this.I know your pain,been through it with with our four legged family twice in the past 18 months.First was our beagle mix molly with a severe back injury that left her paralyzed and second just recently with my mothers 13 year old beagle to cancer.It's not easy and if I had a penny for every tear shed I'd be a millionaire.words can never ease the pain only time.It's funny how close we get to our dogs.They are truely family.But they will be waiting for us on the other side.
ReplyDeleteMichael,
ReplyDeleteSo sorry, will be sending good thoughts and prayers
Tom b
Michael I am so sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteLance
Michael...
ReplyDeleteWords cannot express our share of your tears and sadness at the loss of Alf. Alf and Pokke-San were cherished family, and leave a void in all our lives. A photo of Alf when a puppy, and Pokke when a kitten, look down on me as I type. There they will remain.
As you said with Pokke, we know that bringing four legged friends into our lives is not going to have a happy ending. Will we do it again? Probably, for the bonds formed are worthy of the sorrow we know will come much too soon. That's just the way we are.
Alf the Wonder Beagle for 12 years and Pokke-San the tailless Manx for 8 years, provided you and your Sweetie many happy and memorable hours. Those memories are yours for the rest of your lives.
Others in our family have experienced the same gut wrenching sorrow, and are with you now.
Sadly, and much too soon, it is again time for "Bless the Beasts and the Children". Weep....and smile Michael, Alf's Angel knows how much you and your Sweetie hurt.
Jim
Michael, so sorry for your loss. Two in such short succession.
ReplyDeleteListon
Sorry Michael
ReplyDeleteMichael, so sad to hear about your loss. I will miss the exploits of Alf in your blog and podcast.
ReplyDeleteBill in Central Texas
My sincere condolences. Excuse me, I have to go hug my GSDs.
ReplyDeletePrayers up, It's been a few years now that I lost my boy Maxx, had him from a two week old pup when we adopted his momma Tasha and all 9 puppies that came with her. Maxx and I connected from the git-go and it still pulls at my heart when I get to thinking about him. He was the best buddy I have ever had bar none.....
ReplyDeleteHere's a pic of my boy:
ReplyDeletehttp://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_FUlVSs3xJk/ToysTNah-SI/AAAAAAAAADs/XU7lJKkEEkM/s1600/MAXX.jpg
Michael I am so sorry for your loss
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear of your lose. Hearing tale of Alf always added a bit of levity to the pod casts and blog. My simpathies and prayers are with you and yours.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for you in your sad loss of your fur-friend. I read about this on Brigid's blog.
ReplyDeleteMay you find peace and comfort in your memories.
I'm sorry, Michael. I know how much Alf meant to you.
ReplyDeleteDamn Mike! I know how it is loosing a loved one. May she rest in peace!
ReplyDeleteMB
ReplyDeletewords cant tell you how sorry my wife and I feel for your family's loss
Jerry & Vanessa
Sorry the hear it Michael.
ReplyDeleteThere is a touching tribute at that illustrates the grief that we all share when we loose our buddy... Been through that too many times... May God bless you as you endure the pain that only time can ease.
ReplyDeleteMy 8 year old Golden Retriever just came over and laid his chin on my knee and is looking up at me right now wondering what's wrong....
I know this pain. Adopting a pet is to sentence yourself to deep loss when that horrible day comes.. after many, many seemingly endless days of unquestioned loyalty and unconditional love. Coming home after a long trip and to see that tail wagging. Never mad, never judgemental. I am deeply sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteMichael
ReplyDeleteI dont have any better words than all those other eloquent friends;
We here at my house are sorry for your loss and pray that memories of the good times will help ease your sorrow a bit.
Regards
GKT
I am so sorry Mister Bane. Lu and I will say a prayer for you and Alf.
ReplyDeleteUntil you are together again...
I just wanted to add my condolences. It was obvious from listening to the podcasts that she was a very special to you.
ReplyDeleteVery sorry for your loss. There is no love more unconditional than the love a dog has for his master. R.I.P Alf.
ReplyDeletePrayers to you and your sweetie Mr. Bane.
-Greg
Ah Mike that bites, the pain eases after awhile and that makes me at least feel bad all over again. It would be nice if they lived even half as long as we did.
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for your loss. Some will say he was only a dog, to those I say they are not a human nor a man.
ReplyDeleteVery sorry for your loss.
ReplyDeleteMichael, Denise;
ReplyDeleteMy deepest sympathies, beagle owner to beagle owner.
We just hit the one-year anniversary of loosing Ally and it still hurts.
Alf was lucky to have such a caring family. The love of a dog, while almost impossible to replace, is eternal.
Allen
Your Dog had a good life, right?
ReplyDeleteHe lived with a great family in a house full of guns, so I'd say he had a good life.
Was he spoiled, like dogs should be? I bet he was. You probably fed him doggy biscuits and little pieces of whatever meat you were cooking at the time. I do that all the time.
Did he do that little "doggy-grin" sometimes?
Alf is still with you, Mr. Bane.
Really sorry to read this. May the memories of your happy times together carry you both through this difficult time.
ReplyDeleteDear Michael,
ReplyDeleteSo sorry for your loss. I enjoyed reading the posts about Alf. As a fellow Beagle caretaker, I understand what special companions they are.
Regards,
Victor
I'm sorry. Losing a loved animal is so hard. They are always in your heart.
ReplyDeleteWell just damn, Michael. To lose both of your fur babies in such short order--that's hard. I'm fortunate, I've always had time to heal between losses.
ReplyDeleteLike so many others have said, the two are together again, and you'll see them again.
You hang in there. I suspect that life is going to bring you some good soon. The circle always turns.
I will truly miss Alf perhaps the most famous beagle in all the podcast universe. We are truly blessed if in our lifetime if we have one or two really great dogs come into our lives. From the years and years of listening to your podcast it plain to see Alf was one of those dogs. It is amazing how much they touch our lives. May the pain fade and the memory's always remain vibrant. Trent
ReplyDeleteDear Michael, and his Sweetie,
ReplyDeleteI share your sadness for your friends for you have taken us for many walks and shared their adventures with us.
They are keeping a homey spot for you, and await your greeting when you are someday reunited.
All the best . . .
It sure saddened me to read this, I know Alf was a big part of your family. Animals can really hold a special place in our hearts. From listening to your podcast for a few years now I've even shared some of your stories and comments about Alf with my daughters. I'm truly sorry for your loss!
ReplyDeleteTodd
Damn, Michael, I'm sorry to hear about Alf. Seems there's a lot of this going around. My condolences.
ReplyDeleteNot ALF! So sorry Michael. We love you! A little tribute in the Podcast is in order.
ReplyDeleteMy condolences as well. Friends, Family, Internet Friends have all lost pets recently. It's like losing a part of ourselves.
ReplyDeleteIt is a fearsome thing to love that which death can touch.
ReplyDeleteI wish peace to the two of you.
They are with us for so short a time, but remembering their joy in life makes our pain from their passing bearable.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry about your loss. I had to put my Boykin Spaniel Harry sleep after 15 years and it the worst day of my life. I just couldn't stand to watch him suffer anymore. Living with dogs is such a blessing and a curse.
ReplyDeleteIf you have you have not read this, I suggest The Oatmeal's My Dog: The Paradox. It, like much of the author's work, has a bunch of bad language. But it is hilarious, and true, and one of the best things I've ever seen.
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/dog_paradox
So very sorry to learn of your loss - our furry friends fill such a huge space in our lives, and leave such a tremendous void when they go. I've always loved how you've woven the adventures of Alf and Pokke into your stories - I'll miss them too!
ReplyDeleteMichael,
ReplyDeleteVery sorry to hear about Alf the Wonder Beagle, my sympathy goes out to you and your wife.
We also lost one of our dogs years ago due to an internal hemorrhage, fell in the morning and by 7:00 he was no longer with us.
Losing our dogs is very difficult but the love they give while they are with us is worth the pain.
My sister-in-law sent me this link years ago, http://www.godanddog.org/.
Godspeed,
Howard
Your story of Alf's Worldly Adventures was the most Touching & Enthralling Podcast I have every heard. I wish You well in your life and wish Alf & The Tailless Cat much fun on their new Journey!
ReplyDeleteThank You!!!!
Just finished your latest podcast.... Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThoughts and prayers Michael.
ReplyDelete“We need another and a wiser and perhaps a more mystical concept of animals. Remote from
ReplyDeleteuniversal nature and living by complicated artifice, man in civilization surveys the creature
through the glass of his knowledge and sees thereby a feather magnified and the whole image in
distortion.
We patronize them for their incompleteness, for their tragic fate for having taken form so far
below ourselves. And therein do we err. For the animal shall not be measured by man.
In a world older and more complete than ours, they move finished and complete, gifted with the
extension of the senses we have lost or never attained, living by voices we shall never hear.
They are not brethren, they are not underlings: they are other nations, caught with ourselves in
the net of life and time, fellow prisoners of the splendour and travail of the earth.”
― Henry Beston, The Outermost House: A Year of Life On The Great Beach of Cape Cod
Glad to read your post :). It is very informative!
ReplyDeleteI appreciate your blog post, beautifully expressed and well written.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ReplyDeleteWe share your loss. From experience, a sudden death is easier on both you and your beloved companion, than the long slow painful deterioration that requires you to make the decision to put a pet to sleep. We've lost 1 Shepard to an accidental death, and two to old age. All were difficult. The bond that existed will still be there in their memory. You were truly Alf's best friend. Peace.
ReplyDeleteI cannot thank you all enough for your words, your prayers and your thoughts during this time. They mean the world to my Sweetie and I. It has indeed been a hard winter, and friends make it easier.
ReplyDeleteWe've made the decision to bring another kitty into our home. His name is Asta, and he doesn't have a tail. I know there will be a time when we bring another dog, another beagle, into our lives — Alf would not want us to remain unsupervised for long! — but that time has not yet arrived.
Again, thank you from the bottoms of our hearts for your sympathies and most importantly for sharing the trail with all of us...
mb
Just saw this today, haven't checked your blog in a while I guess. I am truly sorry for your loss, I know how deeply critters can burrow into our hearts.
ReplyDelete- Grizz
Asta was the terrier in The Thin Man movies, with William Powell and Myrna Loy:
ReplyDeletehttp://www.imdb.com/name/nm1208817/?ref_=ttfc_fc_cl_t15
I lost an 8 moth old Brittany in an unfortunate highway incident. Here in Pittsburgh Pa we recently lost a Canine Officer to a rodent of a human. The outpouring of support helped me. As with Canine's a hunting partner is a true loss. God Bless and know this. dog's DO go to Heaven
ReplyDeleteI am sorry. Praying for comfort for you and your Sweetie.
ReplyDeleteI have had to have two of my dogs put to sleep due to terminal health issues. It is the hardest thing to lose good friends. I understand your loss, and send my best wishes to you and yours, at this sad time.
ReplyDeleteMichael,
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure if this would be appropriate at this time, but the subject matter may eventually be:
http://www.readjamesonparker.com/books-by-jameson-parker/to-absent-friends
Michael you and your sweetie are in our prayers. We heard the podcast the other day and started crying when we heard of Alf's passing. We both have no children so we can relate to how pets become your children. Your ending to the podcast was beautifully spoken. You will see Alf and Poke again. Until that time, take the memories and keep them in your heart and know that they are at peace.
ReplyDeleteChris & Sarah from PA
I listen to Downrange Radio on my commute to work. #358 left me in tears.
ReplyDeleteLosing a companion is very hard. However you can take some comfort in knowing that Alf had a great life and in return was the unconditional love that only a dog can give.
Give your Sweetie a hug and raise a glass. For we are not to grieve the loss but celebrate the life of one of Gods creatures.
I listen to Downrange Radio on my commute to work. #358 left me in tears.
ReplyDeleteLosing a companion is very hard. However you can take some comfort in knowing that Alf had a great life and in return was the unconditional love that only a dog can give.
Give your Sweetie a hug and raise a glass. For we are not to grieve the loss but celebrate the life of one of Gods creatures.
I am so sorry, Michael.
ReplyDeleteMichael, A belated wish of sympathy and condolence. After the podcast I had a hard time reading this post let alone commenting. You and Alf were very fortunate to have enjoyed each other's company and to enjoy many an adventure. One dog lover's loss is felt by all dog lovers. Alf, say hi to a black lab named Iggy.
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