Monday, November 28, 2005

Back in the Harness

I'm shaking myself out of my vacation-in-place-holiday lethargy with a big stack of rough-cut VHS tapes of next season's shows. We've made a bunch of basic changes — tightening up the opening of SHOOTING GALLERY and slicking up the graphics, juggling the overall style of the hi-def cameras (which appears little short of magic to me) and some minor editing changes. The net result — hopefully — will be faster, slicker shows.

Tomorrow, I'm going to spend the day in a Glock armorers' class, trying to finally learn which parts are NOT dishwasher safe! I'm bringing my biggest mallet, some vice-grip pliers and a tube of K-Y jelly, universal tools for disassembly and reassembly of everything from a jumbo jet to a mastadon.

Over the holiday, I did finish re-reading Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time fantasy series, including the latest installment, Knife of Dreams. I've been reading the series for 15 years, I decided to go back and re-read the 10 books and the prequel to figure out WHAT THE FRIGGIN' HELL WAS GOING ON! There are about a billion characters with incomprehensible names, enough plotlines to gag a soap opera writer and a fascination with thrusting bosoms that would do Robert Heinlein proud.

Still, Robert Jordan is a brilliant writer and a master plotter. Heck, I've hung in there for 15 years, and since each new book debuts at number one on the NYT best-sellers list, apparently I'm not alone. I write novels, and I can't even imagine the plotting processes that would yield 15 years of interlinked plots! I stand in awe.

So now I've got to sit around and wait for the next installment — according to the fan sites, tentatively titled A Memory of Light — which will wrap the series up.


Michael Bane said...


New computer/new browser!!!

Welcome back!

I'll loan you all 11 volumes of the Wheel of Time, if you'd like. Read one, and you're sucked in big time.

Heinlein was a profoundly subversive writer...if, occasionally, not the best writer writer. Strangely enough, I have based my entire haphazard career on a Heinlein short story — "-We Also Walk Dogs" — which sort of explains why my resume is so strange, although it does not explain why I am not rich.


Anonymous said...

It's good to see that something will be done with the opening of the show. It tends to drag on a bit.

Anonymous said...

Hooray! The opening was good the first time but damn is it long. Too much of the old time shooting gallery. We got the message from the start so move to the real shooting. Thanks for doing a great show.

My buddy and I decided you're like the Outdoor Channel's version of Emeril. You got the best, coolest show and it's all because of your 'hostess with the mostest' routine.

PS Can I start the fan club?

Anonymous said...



I gave him 5 books. By then *he* couldn't keep who what who and doing what and where straight, and I said "nevermind". And I'll read some *bad* books, but Jordan's waaaaay over the top.

Plus, at least, at the time, the characters were *so dumb*. Ok, I love you and all honey, but I can't tell you why I've got to go kill myself, so, don't follow me or anything. He's bothered by something. I'll follow him, but refuse to talk to him about it, and we can chase each other for 4 books this way....

Hey, the people in relationships *I* know would last 5 minutes before going "What in the HELL are you doing?" on either side of that.


(Good friend of mine loves Jordan, but has to re-read the entire series any time one book comes out, (this was back by book 7, or 8) in order to try and keep track of what's going on.
Rand al'Thor: Tam is my father.

(Nothing happens. Then, nothing happens. Then, unexpectedly, nothing happens. Everything is FRAUGHT with PORTENT.)

Moiraine: Everybody come with me.

Everybody: No. Well, ok.

(They travel a LOT. Something happens that isn't explained. Something happens that doesn't make sense. Something happens.)

Rand al'Thor: Tam is my father.

THE (predictable, cliched, dumb) END

Fans: Yah! Wah hah! This is the greatest book ever! Whoo hoo! This is the greatest series ever! Whoopie! Yee haw!

Michael Bane said...

Jordan got better...honest!

He's still of the heaving bosoms school of fantasy, but the last couple of books have been pretty powerful.

And if you insist on reading a really thoughful book, I refer you to S. M. Stirling's alt.history, DIES THE FIRE. The very *idea* of gunpowder no longer working certainly creeps me out!


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